Like many of those who belong to the “sandwich generation” - families with both young children and elderly parents - you may be feeling overwhelmed as the two groups require your care and attention.
Your time and efforts can be constantly divided between them. And in most cases, the declining ability and health of aging parents is starting to demand increasingly more from you.
If the challenges are mounting and you need a solution, Nurse Next Door Homecare has many services that can provide benefits that flow in both directions - to the elderly parents in need of care, and their adult children in need of some relief.
“Families that are feeling overwhelmed, they need to know there are options out there, and to make a call to find out what they are,” says Carol Lange, owner of Nurse Next Door in the TriCity region. “Sometimes, there are seniors taking care of elders, and they need breaks and an opportunity to enjoy retirement too.”
And though the topic may be a difficult one to approach with reluctant, elderly parents, there is some help to break the ice.
“The big key is to get a third party professional - a physician or home care manager - involved in the discussion,” Lange says. “That helps you to work around the emotions that you and your parent are feeling.”
That’s because many elderly parents try their best to reassure their adult children they are fine with their current living arrangements.
“But in many cases they really aren’t,” Lange says. “For some, they have been increasingly over-depending on their family for quite a while. And their adult children are steadily getting worn down as they try to tend to the mounting responsibilities in their life. And sadly, it can take a crisis event, like the hospitalization of an elderly parent, to bring the subject into focus for everyone involved.”
The best course of action to help avoid that particular scenario is to have a discussion and get some care visits into place, well before reaching that point.
“It’s unfortunate, but it’s the norm for so many families,” Lange says. “They wait too long and are left having to deal with a crisis.
“Instead, if you address the situation early enough, everyone can examine what outside assistance can be provided and how it can make a positive difference to all parties.”
The elderly parents get the care they need, right in their own homes. And, adult children receive relief from being stretched too thin.
“It’s all about aging in place with the right kind of support,” Lange says.
Homecare can be customized to fit particular situations and needs - visits at specific times of the day, longer visits, overnight care, and help with homemaking, laundry, fresh meals, running errands, and personal hygiene care are all available, either a few times a week or round-the-clock. “Plus, family-funded care means engaged, reliable, consistent care staff that you can depend on,” says Lange.
And all of it is done right in the client’s own home, a place where they feel safe, comfortable, connected, and, as a result, often become more accepting of the help being provided.
“Pushing someone to move so that an adult child can have peace of mind is most often a losing proposition,” Lange says
Getting some outside care in your own home can also make much better financial sense than shifting to assisted living. This is because often a person may be able to use the growth in the value of a family home to cover the costs of homecare, versus selling the home and paying “rent” in an assisted living facility.
A typical family-funded home care schedule costs around $2000 a month for 3-4 visits each week. This can bring safety, peace of mind and it helps mom and dad with the activities they need help with so they can stay healthy and at home.
For more about Nurse Next Door and how they can provide solutions for your family’s care needs, visit their website, nursenextdoor.com/locations/coquitlam-port-coquitlam-bc/.
